Life of Buck

Friday, March 31, 2006

you know what's sad? when people don't mature from when they weere in 3rd grade. sure they might physically might have matured, but you can read the same person you havent seen in years exactly the same. they could perhaps, say, still be an arrogant snob who puts down otheres to make themselves feel better.

when other people have moved on and don't care about the little nothingness fighting of grade school.

so there's something to think about. because recently i stumbled upon that particular problem.

it's friday night and once again on the rare occasion i'm not doing anything. ho hum. i was going to do something, i had it planned out, but they sorta ditcched me. not ditched, but more of wasn't able to due to all the other things they were doing this week. but i guess it's fine. i'm just hanging around here listening to misty edwards and being alone. heye ezra got cable. i could indulge myself but watching some stupid music videos. that's always interesting...

eh who knows.

but tomorrow pilar is having her party and that's exciting!

and i've decided when i get older i want to work at the co-op. it will definitely be an exciting adventure. mississippi market infact.

i went to the omni theater for the first time in my life today and it was AMAZING! it was about inidia too so there were all these cool shots of the himalayas and people throwing colored smoke in there and cruff.

and then i had kurdish food with satya. and i just want you all to know, if you want to capture my heart, feed me kurdish bread, feta cheese, and kalmata olives. I LOVE FETA CHEESE. i have a passion for it...

this morning at 7:45 natalie came over and we snuggled in my bed and talked for a while. then we drove over to phalen and walked around it. it was such lovely weather. at one point we stopped and climbed up on the lifeguard chair and prayed. yes it was lovely. then we went to jamba juice, which also has my heart.

in less than two months i'll be in israel!!!

my soul pants for God and God alone.

i painted my trashcan even more tonight, and it's so lovely...

::quoth anna:: at 9:00 PM

Thursday, March 30, 2006

i really have no time to update this. seeing as this is the first night in a week i'll be sleeping in my own bed and all.

i've been having fun times with satya and manda and britnee, and such. and last saturday, christine, satya, ellie, and i had an arthur party and ate soup and homemade bread. it was an amazing time. impactfulness.

spiritual gifts is an exciting thing.

britnee's house for a couple of days was funn. always wee children to watch and silly movies. We definitely watched the chipmunk adventure!!!
man playing with dog in deep voice: heeeey. heeeey. heeeey.

ms miller: avalible for what?

you'd just have to see for yourself.

and yesterday i got to canter her silly horse, but now i'm so sore. but guess what!?

we got a new dryer so i can finally wash my clothes and dry them at my own house! don't ever take advantage of that..let me tell you. all those times i had to lug that big plastic garbage bag of my clothes around church. so i'm going to have nice clean bedding for tonight, which i am mucho excited about. and you know what? i want to jump in my froggy pajamas now and sleep. Yes. Sleep. And rosh Kodesh is tomorrow, and I'm sure you wish you knew what that was.

Misty Edwards is an amazing singer...i'm going to burn her cd so i can listen to it tonight because i borrowed mine to natalie's.

israel is fastly approching. and ps i'm so stressed out about shcoolwork, because it's cruffy like that. SO POINTLESS. i can't wait til summer.

note to self: sign up for sunshine. BY TOMORROW. AUGH.

april 10th fastly approches as well. not sure what to do.
and oh man i can't express to the public how much i want to get my hair cut.

::quoth anna:: at 12:40 AM

Thursday, March 23, 2006

basically, yea.

but guess what? if you click the E now under this I totally have a dope daily Bible verse thing. So you can renew your minds!

Haha, so this sub popping and locking teacher made us watch this video on how hip hop and the different forms of it got started and people kept saying, he's one cool cat! or, that move is so dope man! or that cool cat with the dope moves!

haha it made me smile. and the crazy names people give themselves like spice nice, mr animation, crazy legs. hehe..how lovely in a weird way.

anyways i'm in study hall which i now have, ooo yum. and i'm going to satya's house tonight, which is crazy hazy dazy mazy.

some people's kids!

oh sick...i was just reading some old blog posts i made. i sounded like a freaky little kid. like someone i use to know..or do know but don't talk to anymore.

::quoth anna:: at 3:55 PM

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

so selah.

can you say pretty much amazing? i surely can.
it was a fantabulous weekened.

lovely worship, lovely people, lovely games..

i dearly so love big bootie and mafia. and teh car game was definitely intriguing. steve is....OH MAN, too funny for words i guess you could say. So is Autumn. And Jordan and Trevor overthink mafia.

i can't really go in to detail about how good it was for me and how i've grown, but i have the memory really.

worship was soooooooo good. i love Jesus. Pilar and Austin are quite good singers.
so..misty edwards is an extraordinary singer as well.
i definitely got her cd on monday, and this makes me smile.

school is like cruff.

but i am clean.

this is a blllllarg post. nothing mucho to say. have to work on a paper.

i so have a study hall 3rd period tuesdays and thursdays! good bye voice and speech!

::quoth anna:: at 11:47 AM

Monday, March 13, 2006

Underoath-I'm Content With Losing

Like I said
"Leave your baggage at the back door"
I'm leaving you the way I think it should be
We're always pulling into spaces that we can't back out of
Starting fights, we can't talk our way out of them

How does it feel to be on the recieving end of this one?

I'm half way there
It's all on me
This is what I get for wanting more
This is the way it's got to be
Desolate, alone, and searching
So I walk around with this rope in my hand

So I'll tie it around and around
I'll tie me down

I'll fantasize of being manic
And leaving us behind
In your eyes you were the one that tried

Acceptance is what holds us here
And you my dear are the one I fear tonight
We'll try just one more time

This is the moment that we all live for
Are you ready?

I'm half way there
It's all on me
This is what I get for wanting more
This is the way it's got to be
Desolate, alone, and searching
So I walk around with this rope in my hand

So I'll tie it around and around
I'll tie me down

You can't see past my waving hands
Just running away again
You can't see past my waving hands
Just run!

You think so loud it hurts my ears
I want to know how to get through this
Without choking up
I can't feel you
You're so far from me

I'm half way there
It's all on me

yesterday at sim's i watched the exorcism of emily rose. it was disgruntling to my soul, but it made me smile when i thought about steve glancey chanting last wednesday, "1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6!'" And then when Leah said she thought that movie was funny or something he was all, "Are you serious? I almost pissed my pants!"

heh.

so my head hurts and i'm feeling very...hopeless.

tobac is wack

but it's a snow day and that's good.

::quoth anna:: at 12:26 PM

Monday, March 06, 2006

life is so..random.

it's weird how one moment i'm down with everything and getting along just lovely, and the next second i want to lunge over and die. just like that, *snap*. or maybe as satya sometimes says, need someone to be just so disgusted with my skinny-ness that they come over and snap me like a twig.

i have this all of a sudden feeling where i want to gag. oh yes. i want to gag out all the care in me. just spit it out and walk away. oh gosh i can't even think about it.

yesterday small group came over and somewhat cleaned. we more so watched the oscars and pilar taught us ballet. hmm i love ballet. speaking of which me and christine went to carmina burana yesterday and it was pretty elegant. although we both agreed it was probably about sex. scandal.

lineya had her birthday party saturday night, better than i expected.
fridays fill me with the concept of freedom.

last friday at school was actually swiftly moving along. after school went so so.
school's psycho. the teacher's, especially a certain spanish teacher can be quite cruel and unusual let's just say. spanish pretty much makes me want to jump of a cliff. but algebra and history make me want to jump of a bigger one with rocks at the bottom.

do you ever feel..used?

in acting we had to take newpaper articles and form a character off of them. i found this amazing one about this man in a german prison camp around ww2 and what it was like. it described how he had to live in a little cell with a door that only had a peep hole that could be looked in to, so they could watch him, but he couldn't see them. and it told about all he had was a wooden bed and a bucket. he had absolutely no social contact so it drove him to twisted thinking to the effects of wanting to be interrogated, because then he could talk to people. he even would want to be tortured, as long as it involved someone else. but then again he was going through it anyways, having no contact with anyone and whatever. and what would you do? there's nothing to write with. it's almost like you HAVE to keep everything in your head in your head. you could scream at your prison walls, but then again, your voice would only bounce back at you. and i suppose that's enough to make anyone go insane.

me at least.

sometimes i like to ignore the fact that i am me. not that i would want to be someone else, well maybe, but more so i'd like to just shut up all the bad cruff i do. isn't it awful enough i have to hurt others? and then i hurt myself.

Oh well. Jesus gets me through it. Thoughts of Him are much more pleasent than German prison camps and living on earth.

i feel like watching the goonies.

you know what a good quality book is? mr popper's penguins. what a lovely story..

and the sad thing about me is i write the names of people i'm mad at in mustard on my sandwich for lunch tomorrow.

::quoth anna:: at 6:48 PM

Thursday, March 02, 2006

hot sexy little thai dress!! -quoth satya

so i'm at satya's and i decided to do a quick random post because it's grood stuff.

umm anything to say? acting is blech.

woman please!

i honestly don't know what to type. hey i did service at small group on sunday night and it went so so. i did it because on sunday would have been my mom's birthday and i decided to coordinate the two things. pretty slick. speaking of which, andy potts decided i'm like a panther but not? because i kind of slide up to him. my thoughts for the day.

::quoth anna:: at 5:43 PM